"No One Thought We'd Survive This" or "I Haven't Felt This Whole In Years"

The sun is just barely considering dropping behind the bright tin roof across the street. This whole room is bright gold and there's laughing leaking from the kitchen. I'm sinking into this overstuffed chaise lounge and I can hear the ocean outside this open window while the breeze crawls in like a child sneaking in after curfew.

If there were an over-the-counter cure for the blues, sunset in a big beautiful house on the beach with your best friends would be it. Montgomery turned out to be a bust when most of my family ended up sick or busy, and a mere 3 hours drive away was my kind of paradise. This three-story house might as well be made out of windows, and everywhere you look there's the ocean. All the furniture is pale beach colors and too big and too full and covered in pillows. Last night we made tons of pasta and ate together at a big table looking out at the stars and we drank wine and laughed and talked and were whole together.

Today there were no plans, just wandering. It was sixty degrees and the sky was so clear you could see the earth curving. We walked through the town and went into the bookstore, up to the record store. We drank cold coffee and looked out at the brightest sun you've ever seen in your whole damn life. We listened to good music and walked to the beach with beer and gelatto and we built pyramids in the sand with our hands. We ran into the ocean, as freezing cold as December would have it, and danced with each other.

Tonight? Who knows. Watching the stars on the beach right after we have wine at the cafe in town. We might have margaritas and eat expensive mexican food and hold hands for the whole night. Or we'll mix drinks in the kitchen and drink out on the porch where we can smell the sand and talk about what it was like when we were in highschool and everything seemed so important.

I'm not thinking about work I have to get done, or what boy is making me feel bad about myself now, or how I'm spending money I don't have. I'm just thinking about sunshine and my best friends. I'm thinking about God and love and snacks and being warm and sand and giggling and books and this amazing couch.

This was the best decision I've made in my life.

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